http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a?format=rss Tribe.net. Local Connections http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#30483023-ef74-4483-99d1-7b81f56f38ea Anon, I really hope you are able to get some help with this it sounds like a tough deep connection that you are trying to clear (like uprooting a full grown oak tree). I wouldn't presume to know anything about your relationship but perhaps there is something you are still working through so the relationship is not able to clear completely? As you probably already know, sometimes stuff we have to work through within ourselves causes us to send out the signal that another matches so we can then clear it. I sometimes think that's what soul connects/mates/friends are all about - not necessarily a romantic love interest but sometimes a preplanned nudge to remind us to open our eyes again. Sometimes those soul friends can play the bad guy role and not even (consciously) know why. Thu, 30 Jul 2009 18:08:01 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#30483023-ef74-4483-99d1-7b81f56f38ea Michelle 2009-07-30T18:08:01Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#55acaf76-1957-48b4-937f-0836d8c34815 Guilty of most counts on this topic. Thanks for all the posts and thoughts every one has shared with each other. I have a terrific support partner that her and I are working through many condition responces related to codependency. Hard to unlearn all of them and yet working on one or two at a time over time has made a difference for the both of us. We both know this will be a long fight to over come. Wed, 29 Jul 2009 07:57:10 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#55acaf76-1957-48b4-937f-0836d8c34815 David 2009-07-29T07:57:10Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#a62e4d76-2a5a-4fb3-b710-8b6335334d37 I have worked on shielding...I just can't seem to do it well with this one person. It helps a LOT in everyday situations, but this is different. I've cut the cord energetically a thousand times (probably literally)...it does fade a little each time, but it was just so strong, like cutting out part of myself. Not like my normal experience of feeling people's anxiety or sadness and then being able to let it go with some effort. It has been great at times but traumatizing too. I didn't mean to say anyone was evil, I know it's not intentional...I think it's Vampiric because he doesn't understand or control his own empathic tendencies. I think it's hurt him just as much in the end. Too bad I can't explain without sounding crazy. I don't talk about it outside of the internet except with 1 or 2 people. It's too hard to explain that it's not delusional. I will check out that guided meditation! Wed, 29 Jul 2009 00:52:36 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#a62e4d76-2a5a-4fb3-b710-8b6335334d37 Rachel 2009-07-29T00:52:36Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#04e0c0df-f1c2-4efe-92e1-d821c16df7aa Awesome guided meditation with the focus of cutting etheric cords. Short too. http://www.markmezadourian.com/www.markmezadourian.com/Podcasts/Entries/2009/6/25_AATrioClearing.html Sun, 26 Jul 2009 08:12:04 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#04e0c0df-f1c2-4efe-92e1-d821c16df7aa Dave 2009-07-26T08:12:04Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#bb7ccff8-388d-4253-9612-cb4a2abc75ca Have you learned to put up shields of white energy and love, to deflect and protect yourself. I used to think I was always safe at home, behind walls, but found out somewhat over year ago, it was not the case. I joined Indigo society site and found the distance rule no longer applied. I could do long distance sensing before this time, but it was limited. But with dealing with other Sensitives and etc, I found it was too easy to tap into them and they me. Some times it was visions, but then I was aware that they are getting in my head. I have a problem, always have, I am a hypersensitive morphic empath. I feel others emotions like mine own, and it can be hard at time to tell who is me, but uncharacteristic thoughts and behavior does give it away. I found that Vampire and controlling evil like people would start contentious arguments and then feed off of it, they did others the same as well. I got advice from a few, and prayed about it, and it came to me how to put up Shields. I imagined, envisioned, holding my hands above my head and moving them around my top of my head, visualizing a white shield of energy flowing down from my hands, totally enveloping me, like something one would see on a Star Trek or etc space Sci Fi movie. It work, all to well, felt like I was in a emotional vibe sound proof room. I later modified it, by doing it over again, but thinking I needed holes in it, so I could sense out of it, when I needed or wanted too; later I modified it a few more times to suite me. It greatly helped with them getting in my head, and me morphing them. I later learned to cut emotional cords, it sounded complicated, but for me, I just simply visualized cutting a cord or cords connecting to them, and that helped even more. It was like closing a door, to a uninvited guest, Nice. Our spirit and minds can do what we envision and what we have the faith to understand and believe in. It greatly helps to have the Holy Ghost/Spirit as a guide. Being a hypersensitive morphic empath, I am not a Vampire, I pick up what is free energy sent out by everyone around me, like a radio picks up from a Radio Station. I find we all connect on some sub level, like computers to a Internet, we are just not normally aware of it. But like a radio, one has to learn to not tune into some stations, over time it becomes more automatic. Now with most stronger negative and evil dark energies, I feel repulsed or don't tune in. But do feel uncomfortable or a sense of darkness or evil, so don't open or leave the area. Vampires do things to create the energy they want to feed on and enter you without permission. I never enter unless invited. David Sat, 25 Jul 2009 17:00:11 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#bb7ccff8-388d-4253-9612-cb4a2abc75ca David 2009-07-25T17:00:11Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#c738af9d-a200-45bc-8424-31e42c55b550 Do you think the Psychic Vampire thing you did would work if the other person isn't there? I need to stop a cycle of someone draining my energy...and I might be doing the same, I'm not sure because it's from a distance. But I get his projected emotions and wonder if I drain him of it the same way. It's really weird, that's never happened with someone not in the room with me. Usually it's out of sight, out of empathic connection. I like the highs - feeling someone's good mood even if nothing in my own life warrants it - but it's probably not worth the lows. I think I get depressed when he does. :-( Sat, 25 Jul 2009 14:12:11 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#c738af9d-a200-45bc-8424-31e42c55b550 Rachel 2009-07-25T14:12:11Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#a68054d8-2373-48a0-a86d-27fd126eff52 I find that what I feel does not take anything from anyone, I just pick up what they are sending out. But I find in exchange, they might be sucking energy from me. At times, it is almost as if I am like a Shiatsu therapist, I receive filter energy. I found heaven today, Fridays I do weekly maintenance on a Chiropractors fish tank, in exchange for a massage each week. I kept being attracted and drawn to this very cute petite young Mexican gal. I was attracted to her, and when ever I looked her way, she was smiling at me. Finally I had to ask her, are you really happy and excited about life, and she responded yes, she is this way 24/7, her father and siblings are this way too. I told how wonder that was, she was lucky, then gave her short Empath 101 course, to let her now where i was coming from. It was a joy to feel her joy and enthusiasm for life. Makes me wish I was more aware of my gifts and had married someone more like that years ago. Though I find most people give me neutral vibes and then a small percent at eat end are like her or the opposite so messed up, they shove me away. Being with a person like that could be very addicting and fun. I understand the sexuality part, real love and sex like most seem to have has eluded me, most of my life. I am married, but my own feelings get in the way, as well as my spouses, we are both Empaths, and passive aggressive, but I am far more Sensitive and higher IQ ed, but we are understand each other, which helps a lot. Her feelings about her body affect me, so we don't have sex as often as I or even she wishes. We have both been abused and have our emotion in secure places, so we don't respond to each other as we really should, but we love each other, and are very patient with each other, but that does help out with our individual frustrations. I guess is just life, and when I see others who I think are really happy, when you get to really know them, they more then often are not happy. Good feeling from other are fine, I really enjoy them, but the pain can be hard to bare. I enjoy the sexual feelings and pheromones from others too, but just causes more frustration, after it is gone, and reality resumes. David Sat, 04 Jul 2009 02:54:19 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#a68054d8-2373-48a0-a86d-27fd126eff52 David 2009-07-04T02:54:19Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#889802c7-fdbe-49a3-b2e7-fa9d4a929efc Sekhmet That's exactly how I feel around my best friend with whom I am in love, who is married to another man, and they both struggle with alcoholism. When I am with them, it is as though a stargate opens and I have access to parts of my higher self and high heart chakra that I do not normally have. I'm not sure what is the mechanism involved, I don't want to be an energy vampire, but my GOD it is so almost like going home when I am with them. It is so complicated by the fact that I of course desire the sexual expression of this love, and cannot have it. Truly it is a great learning lab. I get to have access to parts of my higher self, and feel the wonderful remembrance of unconditional love like at home (with Source), but I also have to put up with the horror of being denied the sexuality part of it, which is like having all your skin ripped off. Fuck! Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:08:39 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#889802c7-fdbe-49a3-b2e7-fa9d4a929efc Dave 2009-07-03T23:08:39Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#d46af814-afc2-4236-b3ca-b5aab3d61901 I fail too, because I am unable to help others in my family to do more, and it drives me crazy at times, and makes me angry. My wife and 9 year old daughter make angry, but I do not express it much, except for slight of hand comments from time to time. I wished I rubbed off on them more. I have fibromyalgia and other problems from my military days decades ago. So I don't always get a lot done each day, but I keep at it. I am the Mr. Mom, I have reversed rolls. I have the problem of a wife who comes home and does almost nothing, most often that is the case. Now that school is out, and she is not sub teaching, she gets up, gets on the computer and now plays online games, which are interactive with others, and she has to defend and build towns and etc, or they get attacked and she looses them. She is hard worker at her jobs, but at home nearly useless. It even affects personal and sexual life. Now her and out daughter take turns playing musical chairs on the computer all day long and all night until 12 to 1 am. I finally got on before bed, after falling asleep in front of the TV. I get on the computer to answer plant questions and respond to emails, and do a few sites like this. But most days, am only online for a few hours, but the time is scattered thought out my waking time. Maybe it is a good think she is not as sensitive, she would not like the things I think about, or feel the resentment I have for her use of time. I am codependent on others, yet at the same time NOT, mine is more in my head or emotional. I am dependent on just feeling they are there. But they are more codependent then I, emotionally and physically. I do most of the things around here, and when I am not here or taking a nap, they just suffer by until I do them. To hear my self say that, wow that sounds sad. But my wife does change, and she is slowly, I guess patience is still the course for now. David Fri, 03 Jul 2009 09:47:35 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#d46af814-afc2-4236-b3ca-b5aab3d61901 David 2009-07-03T09:47:35Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#42282246-2c3b-49cf-ba65-72c1fc0214ff And I thought my family insanity was hard to deal with? Man.. Dave. I feel for you. I am not the mellow one in my relationship. Although we have our reversed moments of panic and mellowness at times being exchanged. I haev recently done an energy healing on my bf from The Psychic Vampire Codex called an attunement. Now I don't know how people feel about Belanger's work and really, I'm just saying that it transformed both of us that night from emo vampire types into "Hey I feel good being around you." In all things, we have choices, even when it seems we're at our most helpless. Fri, 03 Jul 2009 05:08:45 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#42282246-2c3b-49cf-ba65-72c1fc0214ff Sekhmet 2009-07-03T05:08:45Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#e100fe64-cbbe-4454-aa63-ab2755354065 Codependency, never really thought about my relationship like that. Though I know I depend on others for getting through each day, and when they fail, I may fail too. Gee, I can't believe I just said that, but yet, I guess I always knew it. When ever my wife leaves for more then a day, I go through emotional withdrawals. It takes me around 3 days to stabilize and be myself again. I find such times enlightening, just being more with my own feelings and thoughts, and some are not so postive or postive to those normally close to me. I find Empathic coherency has some value, it helps to lessen my tendency to be very stick and radical compared to the rest society, it helps to temper me, and helps me to fit into society better. I would rather live in a world of Empaths only, but that is not reality, so we do what we have to do to survive. Being a very hypersensitive morphic empath, I find I depend upon those close to me, for added strength and focus of mind. But at the same time too, I pick up their weaknesses too. I don't know if all empaths are that morphic and sensitive, but I am. My wife has strengths, but some of the same weaknesses, those weaknesses compound my own. Are we not all codependent in some way in someway, we live on mother earth, we have parents and family, friends, and are in a country and etc. I don't think there is anything that is not codependent to everything else, just part life; some are just better and some not so good. David Thu, 02 Jul 2009 20:57:27 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#e100fe64-cbbe-4454-aa63-ab2755354065 David 2009-07-02T20:57:27Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#9162f98f-5793-46d2-8249-02cc098da3c0 **"What a great learning lab, though"** An apropos name for life - The Great Learning Lab, lol. I think empaths are just often more aware that their is coding (think Matrix) behind what we see but we just don't always know what to do about it. Wed, 01 Jul 2009 18:42:44 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#9162f98f-5793-46d2-8249-02cc098da3c0 Michelle 2009-07-01T18:42:44Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#c457f2b0-9a60-4bb2-8759-e168de5cba89 Well it has been very difficult. What a great learning lab, though. And no matter what, I will always love him. So it's all good. Wed, 01 Jul 2009 04:50:29 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#c457f2b0-9a60-4bb2-8759-e168de5cba89 Dave 2009-07-01T04:50:29Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#c571ce91-1c90-4f2d-95b6-6d396cfc0737 That sounds really rough Dave, yikes. Don't think I wanna try it though - so been there with close family...aagghhh! **"sweeps you off your feet at first, only to slap you back down hard"** That about perfectly describes d/co-d relationships, eh? Tue, 30 Jun 2009 20:15:58 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#c571ce91-1c90-4f2d-95b6-6d396cfc0737 Michelle 2009-06-30T20:15:58Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#bb1ce4e5-206f-48f6-966b-e528bbe370dd aye aye aye. Try being codependent with an alcoholic whose on-again-off-again love for you sweeps you off your feet at first, only to slap you back down hard. Aye aye aye. Tue, 30 Jun 2009 07:16:15 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#bb1ce4e5-206f-48f6-966b-e528bbe370dd Dave 2009-06-30T07:16:15Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#60d9fd45-c6b2-4e0a-b02a-c2cfa74dac1e **"I heard that if you picture both you and the other person having strong, healthy energetic boundaries, it helps both of you even if they aren't aware of it."** That sounds very empowering, anon, and helpful because for one it puts us in our empowering place and two it reminds us that others have the capability and wisdom to do it for themselves too. I also use this meditation a lot - works wonders for me and them :) CO-D AND BEING EMPATHIC I think many disorders are extreme ways of self distraction (old survival mechanisms generally created with limited understanding of the whole picture) be they overly focused on others desires/pain or our own . It would seem that an unhealthy COMPARTMENTALIZER (Type A?) could 'OVER-boundary-ize' all as they marched over people to get the top. While an unhealthy SENSITIVE/EMPATH could 'UNDER-boundary-ize' and have trouble staying on course due to overly dispersing our energy. Since the 'unhealthy' sensitive often doesn't have a strong sense of self (overly identified with outside) we may attempt to find that sense of self using co-dependency (co-d) as the control, eg. if I control my situation and the energy coming from the people in it I can control my world. However, just as a Type A person may find themselves with an early heart condition - from trying to control everything - the empathic co-d will most likely feel their body filled with pain and exhaustion daily (not just at the last minute). I used to say that every day was like a month for me - I was hyper aware of everything and trying to keep all balanced (what I mistakenly thought was balance, lol). Personally, I've found that until I worked on my own inner stuff it was impossible to shake co-d. And even if we clear much of our co-d stuff, being empathic - and naturally more sensitive - it's important to continually stay self aware. Utilizing techniques with self awareness will help us stay centered, keep from being an uber-sponge - which can lead us back to co-dependency again - and find the wisdom and gifts of being a sensitive. Non empathic co-d's I know have very similar issues but just not as extreme. Thank you for starting this topic. I find it necessary to keep hearing other's stories and being reminded of how and why to stay in the 'centered lane.' Mon, 29 Jun 2009 17:57:27 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#60d9fd45-c6b2-4e0a-b02a-c2cfa74dac1e Michelle 2009-06-29T17:57:27Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#6b7ff1cc-2ed3-4bc1-8f23-f119b643d81e "you're feeling someone's codependency, and even if you've coped on your own you could slip based on feeling it from the other & wanting to help them despite possibly crossing a boundary you don't know about?" I totally agree with that. It is so much harder when you have to move past your own stuff AND deal with other people's in a way that is more direct than most people experience. I heard that if you picture both you and the other person having strong, healthy energetic boundaries, it helps both of you even if they aren't aware of it. I do this a lot in meditation, but I haven't been able to verify if it works or not. I think it probably does, knowing now a little better how empathic "abilities" (I feel so arrogant saying that but I don't know what to call it) work. Sun, 28 Jun 2009 23:51:29 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#6b7ff1cc-2ed3-4bc1-8f23-f119b643d81e Rachel 2009-06-28T23:51:29Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#dc1ea1c4-c29e-47cd-ab1a-dad0f5c8ee58 Okay folks, I want to hear a frank discussion on Codependency. I think we need our own groups. Without blatantly f-ing up certain things, I joined groups trying to express how my brain works without saying "empathy is a psychic faculty" directly. Believe me, I can package certain things in certain ways. Its just harder when I desperately want to find out the way codependency works in an empath versus a muggle! It harkens back to my first post on here about how I wanted to know what a muggle was. Anyway some NTs would ask if being empathic is like being Counselor Troi. As far as we know, did she show a codependent personality trait or two on Star Trek: TNG or was it in First Contact when she was put in an odd position of having to get drunk with Zefram Cochrane for some need to extract information from him? I have to wonder if codependent tendencies without referring to certain websites, but instead finding definitions on other websites, is prevalent or even epidemic amongst us. If so, how to manage a group separate from CODA? They have some rules against media dabblings. The Internet may or may not count so I don't want to flub and say anything confidential. I think we should start our own groups though, that much I can say. I tried to explain who I was in a holistic fashion. Instead, I get told I'm ADD, an its shoved down my throat by some idiot who has no idea what he's talking about even though he's done research for himself. I was feeling ill, so I said that I didn't need to take his crap, thanks and walked out. Many groups have social meetings after. It must be a codependent mirror mirror on the wall situation for people like us. Then you're feeling someone's codependency, and even if you've coped on your own you could slip based on feeling it from the other & wanting to help them despite possibly crossing a boundary you don't know about? This is my first instinct based on knowing what codependency is for those who aren't as wired as we are. Sun, 28 Jun 2009 20:58:54 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/d7aee31c-e428-4709-83c9-9671e8cbee0a#dc1ea1c4-c29e-47cd-ab1a-dad0f5c8ee58 Sekhmet 2009-06-28T20:58:54Z