Other gifts?

topic posted Thu, September 18, 2008 - 4:17 AM by  Cat
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I was just wondering how common it is for empaths to have other gifts. The two I know personally do...one is a (largely untrained) healer, the other can sense when spirit of those who are passed are around. Since I just learned about myself and need to find how to ground, shield, and control, I also fear. What if, in unlocking the past and tearing down the ineffectual walls, I discover more? I know that spinning my wheels but staying in the same place is not healthy, but how do I learn to accept that more is not necessarily a bad thing?
posted by:
Cat
offline Cat
New Jersey
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  • Re: Other gifts?

    Thu, September 18, 2008 - 5:25 AM
    I am uncertain about the actual stats, but I would believe that everyone has a skill set . . . meaning: more than one ability. I myself am an empath, and have discovered that I have much more to offer than just empathy. Some things will scare you, others will intrigue you . . . it's all part of the process.

    When confronted with fear while exploring new territory, just attack that fear with logic and reasoning (ya, I know: 'allot easier said than done'). There really is nothing to fear . . . just revel in discovering something new about yourself and how you can perceive the world around you. It really is an exciting experience, especially when you can share it with people who have gone through similar things.

    Anywho, good luck to you, and you know where to find us.

    -Bryan
  • Re: Other gifts?

    Thu, September 18, 2008 - 5:26 AM
    I am uncertain about the actual stats, but I would believe that everyone has a skill set . . . meaning: more than one ability. I myself am an empath, and have discovered that I have much more to offer than just empathy. Some things will scare you, others will intrigue you . . . it's all part of the process.

    When confronted with fear while exploring new territory, just attack that fear with logic and reasoning (ya, I know: 'allot easier said than done'). There really is nothing to fear . . . just revel in discovering something new about yourself and how you can perceive the world around you. It really is an exciting experience, especially when you can share it with people who have gone through similar things.

    Anywho, good luck to you, and you know where to find us.

    -Bryan
  • Re: Other gifts?

    Thu, September 18, 2008 - 9:52 AM
    I think that some of the gifts come with increasing awareness. Some of the little things I have noticed:

    - greatly improved intuition - it's talking louder and louder

    - much faster at judging a person's character - from hours to seconds

    - can find things in the dark - your hand just *knows* where things are

    - driving on a multilane highway - just knowing when drivers in front of you are going to change lanes
    • Unsu...
       

      Re: Other gifts?

      Thu, September 18, 2008 - 4:53 PM
      Read traffic

      - driving on a multilane highway - just knowing when drivers in front of you are going to change lanes
  • Re: Other gifts?

    Thu, September 18, 2008 - 6:36 PM
    Most of us are just sensitive and that lends itself to many forms of perception. Just stay grounded and clear as to what you will allow and what you will not, in your space. Also remain clear in your own intentions. If you are firmly grounded in your intention to serve the world and harm none and you are clear that you are not open to anything that is not of love or light, then you will have no trouble. Trust yourself and know that your perceptions are yours regardless of whether or not those around you perceive or believe what you do. Listen to yourself. You will be ok.

    It is also very important to care for yourself well as it is easy to become overwhelmed with the suffering of the world. It is also easy to become burdened with the task of relieving much suffering in the world so that you don't have to feel it all. It is ok to stop and tune it out here and there and give yourself a break. Otherwise you can get burned out. Do not worry about staying in one place. You will move when you are ready.
  • Re: Other gifts?

    Fri, December 12, 2008 - 7:17 PM
    I think Empaths have more ability then seems present on the surface, It is a matter I think of who we are and what things we have to encounter in life to survive. I have always felt the feelings/emotions of others as if they were mine. And when i was young, I used to think of things somewhat before they happened. And too, when in the military, us guys in the barracks used to sit around and try to send colors, scene's, words, numbers and etc, and I was usually around 90 percent accurate, they maybe 25 percent or less. And then when playing solitaire cards, I used to catch myself once in awhile, knowing what the cards were before turning them over, but when I tried to guess or know on purpose, it wouldn't work.

    I don't function at all that I know of, unless it is more on a sub level, and I am not aware now, more on automatic maybe.
    I know that I find am most times steered clear of danger, I guess maybe too, I take the thought for granted, I am so used to them.
    Since the military decades ago, I was left with medical problems that they did not know what they were. I developed naturally, through the guidance of the Spirit, to turn on my ability to sense more then just feelings and emotions. It started with using a pendulem, but my X thought it was witchcraft and of the devil, so I prayed and asked the Lord to show me how to do muscle testing and I woke up a few days later knowing how; it was like a switch was turned on for me, and I just knew I could do it and with it came the how as well. I have increased my abilities many times in different areas with this.

    Need for me has been a great motivator in opening up and developing what I can do. I can feel others emotions and feelings as if my own. Also can sense my body functions, and others now as well, near and at a distance, even some I have never met. I seem to have the gift of discernment, and a close connection to the Holy Spirit, which all act in tandem to help me do what I can do.

    I have seen black figure people when in out of body or partial out of body times, and once in awhile catch them barely in the edge of my vision. I have in the past sensed latent past energies left from past traumatic events. I have sensed and had knowledge come to my mind, from where I don't know exactly I guess from the God and or some cosmic library.

    I have been able at times been able to sense the sex of plants and seeds, that was interesting.

    Being a empath is way more then just sensing others feelings.
  • Unsu...
     

    Re: Other gifts?

    Fri, December 12, 2008 - 8:54 PM
    I dont know why people mark themselves and others with specialized abilities. If anyone is a true empath, you can easily realize that everyone has these abilities it's just subconscious to them. It is simply awareness, nothing else. And this awareness is wired in our brains, and some are born with more awareness than others through evolution. But I think empathy is the first step to a whole knew world and other abilities.
    • Unsu...
       

      Re: Other gifts?

      Sat, December 13, 2008 - 3:08 PM
      ***I dont know why people mark themselves and others with specialized abilities. If anyone is a true empath, you can easily realize that everyone has these abilities it's just subconscious to them.***

      I get what you're saying here J., I do. But, I would also say that it's fair and useful to honour and thereby appreciate ourselves and others for having had the courage to drag what is unconscious into consciousness where it is available to us. People who are unconscious of their ablilities don't really 'have' them yet. Also, my sense is that awareness is earned, often hard earned. It takes great courage and discipline to be aware I think.
      • Re: Other gifts?

        Sat, December 13, 2008 - 3:20 PM
        Age helps a bit, too. lol.
        • Unsu...
           

          Re: Other gifts?

          Sat, December 13, 2008 - 3:36 PM
          Yes well, :) depending on the choices one's made during the years that add up to the number that is one's age. ;)
          • Re: Other gifts?

            Sat, December 13, 2008 - 3:54 PM
            An interesting swing. 52 choices. Oh, really many more, of course. My grandparents were born in the Nineteenth Century, not long after the Civil War. You could honestly say that I am now in my second century, having been born in the middle of the last one. LOL! A number of us can do that, ahem. Anyway, the passage of time and a connection to history lend their own swing on experiences, too, I believe. If nothing else, you get to see the same things over and over, which is a lesson in itself, yes? LOL.
    • Re: Other gifts?

      Sat, December 13, 2008 - 5:24 PM
      someone has really grown up
      if these words are written with sincerity

      accepting that everyone has these capabilities rather than proclaiming oneself as havign POWERS is a wonderful step in awareness growth
      • Re: Other gifts?

        Sun, December 14, 2008 - 7:54 AM
        Like others have all ready stated in their replies , I agree that every person has multiple gifts. I think once we accept and begin to allow one gift to manifest in our lives , others are revealed . But each of us walk this path at our own pace , and it can not be pushed . We arrive at this place when it is our time , be it as a result of age , life experience , a spiritual awakening or a combination of multiple factors. I don't think it is a coincidence we are all here sharing our thoughts , and our opinions , I think we all found this place because it makes sense for us to do so in our current stage of our life and our development.

        Our opinions and views may be different , but what brings us together as a community is the fact that we feel comfortable to discuss these topics here openly , and in doing so , often reveal new paths and ideas that would have not occurred without hearing the viewpoints of many, in a forum where we do not feel the outsider.
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        Re: Other gifts?

        Sun, December 14, 2008 - 4:06 PM
        I dont think age has anything to do with it, and cathy, dont comment on my words like you think you understand me or what progress I have made when you have no idea, especially with an example of a simple word you linked with a bad connotation. Give me my space and stop being disrespectful.
        • Re: Other gifts?

          Sun, December 14, 2008 - 7:18 PM
          excuse me J


          in another thread you asked everyone to do a reading on me to see if I am truly psychic

          you cant have it two ways.. you asking everyone in the internet world to read me

          and you telling others that I am an alt

          and you making cracks against me and then saying "leave me my space"

          LOOK I am now going to call you an immature RAT..

          I even didnt put a name to my comment about growing up. You had your space. I was talking about you. I have left some of your words and threats alone. Last time when you asked the entire internet to 'read' me I said

          DESIST

          STOP

          When you open you rself to asking the entire internet to read another YOU are opening yourself to asking for POWER and to use psychic energies unsafely and incorrectly.

          KABOOMMMM Your house may fall over. Your shadow may shiver.

          I have no intention of causing you harm.. I am not cursing you,.

          You in effect cursed your self with those remarks.


          I shall stand on my previous remarks in this thread which said, " if spoken in sincerity these words reflect maturity".
          • Unsu...
             

            Re: Other gifts?

            Sun, December 14, 2008 - 7:44 PM
            Lol? I have never asked once in my life for a reading online ever. And now you are threatening me with my house falling over? I dont care, for I am not fearful of death or of you. Leave me be.
            • Re: Other gifts?

              Sun, December 14, 2008 - 9:52 PM
              Guys , lets step away from the open hostility towards each other in these forums. We all have valid points , and even if we disagree there is room for each of us to be heard. It is a big world out there , and what we see , what we believe is a result of our own life experiences. We may whole heartedly see our view points and ideas as true and valid , and in our perspective , in our life they are. But allow others to disagree , to question our views and learn from them , instead of getting angry. Anger can be counter productive in this context , and to many of us , angry messages resonate very powerfully and deter the original topic to a level where it gets completely lost.



              • Re: Other gifts?

                Mon, December 15, 2008 - 6:21 AM
                thank you for the idea of PM'ing
                I choose to NOT do so because I do not want junk in my private box. Also it makes and allows rudeness to be visible, so ther eis no "I really didn't say this.."

                I have contacted moderators on thi sand developing psychic capibilities.. and no result.

                I choose to not attack, but to stand up for myself.

                The request for me to be 'read' is in developing psychic abiblities in a thread from amber asking for help.
                • Unsu...
                   

                  Re: Other gifts?

                  Mon, December 15, 2008 - 11:11 AM
                  Ok cathyg, with all due respect, it seems to me that you have instead chosen to place junk in our public forum instead.

                  So, I'll leave this thread, and leave you to it.
          • Re: Other gifts?

            Tue, December 16, 2008 - 9:30 AM
            When i came here recently, I thought, WOW as quiet sane site, not like Indigo Society at all. This maybe a smaller site, but the ever troubled dark ones exist here I see now, stirring up contention and seemingly feeding off of it, like a druggie needs his fix.

            If everyone here was a fully sensitive aware Empath, there would not be any contention like this.Sensitive Empaths cannot hurt others without feeling the pain the themselves, as their pain too. Empaths feel connect to each others and others and the Spirit, and become one in thought and understanding, though many times not in how they apply or use it.

            The only anger and deceit I feel is coming from J, His avatar pics says it all too. I find that avatars tell a lot, just like looking into someones eyes or sensing them. I don't have to ask me as to sense someone, it happens automatically, I am not able to turn it off or on at will, but I can go deeper if need be.

            I have seen it over and over again with others and with my son and step son. Kids and adults who have been verbally, mentally and sexually abused, the highly sensitive defensive behavior is very classic and text book in nature. The sad thing is, most don't even know or accept it has happened to them, the healing process can't begin, until they recognize it.

            On Indigo Society, there are a few who seek me out and attack me no matter what I say, even when I complement them or someone else. They do not seem to not like someone speaking light and truth from the heart and the spirit, and every thing you say, they take defensively, it just does not figure.

            I find that being Empathic to a large degree is inherited, and increases or decreases with age, and need. Some bloom earlier but I find many do not really come to full awareness and really start developing until they are around 40, because of the way the world accepts or did accept it in the past 100 years. I find that just because a child is raised around acceptance of it, they still have to learn to accept it for them selves.

            David
            • Unsu...
               

              Re: Other gifts?

              Tue, December 16, 2008 - 10:45 AM
              David I completely agree, but you arent aware of the history and the rudeness this woman has produced. And I tried playing nice but after seeing smart nice people leave and being pushed over and over again, one can only take so much before they finally bark back.
              • Re: Other gifts?

                Tue, December 16, 2008 - 10:52 AM
                oh goodness J.

                stop with the slander

                anyone can coem and go in a tribe



                remember people can read people who come on here.



                You like to bring up bad karma.
                You did so here and lied... your actions are repellant.. and others can read them.

                Find something else to do other than keep on bad vibing me.

                Tribe has suggested holdign an election for a new moderator. Ours is not very active. It might be a good idea.
                • Re: Other gifts?

                  Tue, December 16, 2008 - 10:54 AM
                  oops excus eme

                  tribe suggested that fo r4developing psychic abilities

                  no tthis one.
                  I hav enot been concerned about the moderator on this one.
                  I may ask him to have you STOP however.

                  It's time.
                  • This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.

                    Re: Other gifts?

                    Tue, December 16, 2008 - 12:01 PM
                    I am sorry for my tone in the following statement , but here it is . This place has been for many years, a safe , non hostile place for many of us to come together and share ideas and a positive exchanges of ideas. I do not understand , why two people , see that it is fair for anyone else , to subject the rest of us to this type of ridiculous behavior . I do not care , who is to blame , I do not care who is right or wrong , all I know is that the open hostility , that you two have hijacked several threads with , for what ever reasons needs to stop now.

                    These forums belong to us all, and the incredibly negative vibes the rest of us need to deal with , as a result of this type of activity constantly rearing it's ugly head , is not conducive to a healthy community. I suggest both of you take a long look at how incredibly silly you are being with attacking each other repeatedly here. This is a community of people who are very sensitive to the emotions of others, and is based on healing and positivity. This type of bickering , and open hostility has no place here, period.

                    Up until now , most people have moderated the content of their comments , and exchanges of ideas with a level of personal control, regardless of if they agree with each other or not. Please take your fighting away from our forums , stop exposing the rest of us to this negativity repeatedly. If you need help , ask for it ,if you need ideas t dealing with anger then ask for it , but stop using this place , this safe haven, as a battle ground for your personal grudges.

                    I am not calling either of you out , I do not wish to antagonize anyone , but having dealt with this stuff for some time now , across several otherwise positive threads , has left me no choice but to speak up. I am not picking sides , I am not pointing a finger at either of you , but simply asking you to stop fighting with each other on public forums , that belong to all of us ....
                    • Re: Other gifts?

                      Tue, December 16, 2008 - 12:54 PM
                      I did NOT start it

                      It is really unfair of you to call me out on it

                      He is the one who called on everyone to read me.
                      He continues to write aspersions about my being 2 people.

                      You may not like to read the stuff.
                      It does have to be STOIPPED.
                      Yes, so help stop it./

                      None of these tribes are for asking others to read another or for slander. I am working with tribe on it.

                      In the menantime I get upset from time to time from slander and yes, finally I called him a rat and a jertk.

                      GET your facts straight.

                      And really really think about what you dwould do if it happenbed to you continually.
                      If soem oen made one aspersion after another against you .. publicly on the internet.
                      Tyhe other moderator does nothing. Tribe has to decide what to do in that case. I am waiting.
                      I am very uypset with you rattitude.

                      Just letting soem one slander you over and over onb the public internet is not cool.

                      FYI a recent tribe moder4ator was slandered, bothered, then stalked on here, followed in real life and then raped. Internet stalkign and arguments are a problem,. She returned to tribe adnb the guy began several different identities who began goign after her online. She had to leave tribe. The last I heard she was maybe goign to move. Charges are in process.

                      Messing aroun don the internet; slander; intent to stalk and lying become established actions.. of record.

                      I was on this tribe long before J. was a member. Long before. I used to answer his questions. he did not like my philosophy.. that capabilities are gifts and abilities.. not powers. Nor in my mind is it okito manipulate others in anyway.. whether in their dreams or through tricky hypnotism. I still stand on my thoughts on that.

                      what wouydl you do aft6er a certain point?
              • Re: Other gifts?

                Tue, December 16, 2008 - 1:38 PM
                If found that on the IS site, it was necessary to put up your Shields, one does not get pulled into the other peoples emotions and intent; some I had to learn to do for the first time. I was on IS for some time before I realized why I was starting to battle like the best of them. I meet a good mentor who help me understand it. I am a hypersensitive Morphic empath, so to some degree, I take on the stronger feelings and emotions and intents of those I am around. I used to think my home was safe, but when I started to go to sites like this, I found I was connecting like they were somebody in the same room with me or etc; that now was and distance had not concept anymore..

                I was advised by this mentor to take breaks from the site, and zone out, and find my center and get back on my path when needed. Which is a very good recommendation for any HSP type person, who can get so easily over stimulated and stressed.

                I find that sometimes we just build up emotional and habitual mental scripts, and we keep reacting the same toward people, unless we break away. I can not judge, I have not been here long. But now I feel the same anger which I felt from J, coming from Cathg??? sorry but exactly remember the name. This site does not lend it self very well to movement, it has its awkwardness.

                I find it helps to try and talk in neutrality. And it helps to not accuse anyone of anything, unless you are just explaining what you feel, and how you feel hurt, which is not the same in my books. I try to share what I know, and just leave it at that. The problem usually comes when I do answer questions, and then they tell me I am wrong. My feelings are, if you are going to ask some one something, then you should be open to it, if you are not, then don't ask. I just do not like those who ask you a question, just so they can toast you.

                In essence, ask more of someone if you like the light they share, if not don't be concerned with Turing to correct or change someone, that is their right and decision. It is sort of like getting married, best not marry someone with the idea they will change or you can change them later, most times, just isn't going tog happen. I find if you share the light, if they are going to change they will; more is accomplished with honey then vinegar.



                David
                • Re: Other gifts?

                  Tue, December 16, 2008 - 1:49 PM
                  thank you for your nice words David.
                  I am seripously angry at his slander. SERIOUSLY and at the request of anyoen on th internet to 'read' me

                  and at accusations that I am another. Tribe can investigate it, he can write to them...

                  Finally that when people talk about it that they choose to belay both.

                  No one else has spoken to the request to read me.. or that he denied doing it and then I coudl pull up the thread.

                  But the bigger picture is that internet slander does not always end on th ecomuter.. I mourn my friend. I choose to delete more personal details.
      • Unsu...
         

        Re: Other gifts?

        Sun, December 14, 2008 - 10:11 PM
        ***someone has really grown up
        if these words are written with sincerity

        accepting that everyone has these capabilities rather than proclaiming oneself as havign POWERS is a wonderful step in awareness growth***

        I won't copy the accusation you made to here because reading it once was probably enough really.

        cathyg, I'd appreciate it if you could pm J. with your personal comments aimed at him rather than disrupt a public thread with them.

        At least, I find it a disruption.

        Maybe pm the mediator for assistance, rather than play things out in threads.
        • Unsu...
           

          Re: Other gifts?

          Sun, December 14, 2008 - 11:12 PM
          grrrr, I mean moderator, pm the moderator,not mediator.
          • Re: Other gifts?

            Mon, December 15, 2008 - 6:29 AM
            Re: can some one please help me
            <<If their are any true empaths or psychics here, and you can do an accurate reading, please read amia and cathy and see what you get. And for those who dont have such gifts, just check out amia's picture of her face bandage and her shiny skin, her hair, her eyes, and see if you can connect the dots to cathy.
            >> from J.

            on developing psychic abilities

            Lying??

            HMM

            • Unsu...
               

              Re: Other gifts?

              Mon, December 15, 2008 - 2:47 PM
              -_-'
              • Unsu...
                 

                Re: Other gifts?

                Mon, December 15, 2008 - 2:49 PM
                Can someone tell me why we put up with this woman? Its too bad because most of those who stayed long enough to understand how this woman is left because of the drama she starts. I guess I'll do the same.
                • Re: Other gifts?

                  Mon, December 15, 2008 - 4:48 PM
                  uuhh J

                  you are askign why we put up with me?

                  Your flat out lie is right here.

                  I say again

                  GET OUT
                  • This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.
                    Unsu...
                     

                    Re: Other gifts?

                    Mon, December 15, 2008 - 11:01 PM
                    You are unaware of how many people have left because of you cathyq, you are the one who should leave.
        • Re: Other gifts?

          Wed, December 17, 2008 - 12:22 PM
          I find that each person has different gifts, some inherited from their ancestors and some gifts given us by God, spiritual gifts. I have observed and sensed that these gifts vary just like all other gifts like having musical, mechanical, mathematical talents and gifts. We may all possess some of them to a larger or smaller degree, but some are born with them naturally, and we can either develop them more or not. Does not mean some cannot develop some of them, but the one born with it, is going to be much better at it, with hardly not nearly s much effort. It was not meant that we should all be the same, with the same gifts. It was meant by God, that we each get a part of his gifts, so we would be forced to need each other, and find completeness only in being a society.

          Yes, we can all talk, dance, sing and etc, but some others are just born able to put us to shame in how well they can do it. But I am not upset by them, though maybe somewhat envious. But then that is there gift to share with others, so they can feel special and have something to share with others who might be in need of it.

          I am who I am, an must be happy with that, and develop the gifts I have been given. Many times we are not happy with who we are, but when we accept who we are, and develop that, then we will be the most happy we can be, and best able to help others.

          I do find a lot wannabes who go about laying claim to a lot of gifts, but when you press them for what they can do, I am left with a mystery, of what can they do??? I am usually wary of those making a big spectacle about their gifts, and claiming I am better, or like God himself

          David
          • Re: Other gifts?

            Thu, December 18, 2008 - 7:33 PM
            I have to agree about your point with becoming aware of and accepting who we are David. I spent many years trying to fit into a society, a career , a world where I did not ever feel at home . This caused me quite a bit of inner turmoil as I felt broken or deficient in my inability to find a sense of completeness in the life I was living. Then one day a wise friend asked me , what would you do , if you only had six months to live ?
            I gave him a list of my dreams , my desires , what I hoped I could one day be , ideas and changes I had up until that point feared giving voice to. He just smiled at me and asked , "Why not start first thing tomorrow??" And I did , i was reborn , it was not achieved overnight mind you, but I started taking steps in making my life , as close to what I in my own mind saw as right and just , something that brought me complete joy and a sense of completeness.

            It was once I felt that I was on the right path , walking in footsteps that felt right and natural , along paths that brought me joy , made me feel complete for the first time in my life , that the gifts that I had always suppressed , been ashamed of , started getting stronger.

            What do you guys think though, does this type of thinking come with age , does it come from growing up under the right circumstances , does it come from a spiritual source beyond ourselves , or are we born with it , and if so does it manifest itself once we reach a certain point in our lives? Are there triggers , great joy , or pain , or extreme emotion. I am curious to how and when others started realizing the path that has brought most of us here , to discuss these topics.....
            • Unsu...
               

              Re: Other gifts?

              Thu, December 18, 2008 - 9:46 PM

              I would say it's a combination of empathy and a lack of shame.
              Paraphrased quotes I once read about confidence, 'confidence
              is the certainty that you have no intention of hurting anyone',
              'charisma is having no fear of other people looking at you as
              you are', 'charm is helping people to pay attention to their self
              non-judgmentally'. I think that is what stops a lot of dreams and
              ambitions ..if there is empathy without freedom from shame
              there is self-sabotage because shame feels as if there will be
              harm or misfortune to anything valuable (be it others, success,
              etc.) in the outside world that gets close ..and if there is desire
              or ambition without empathy there is self-sabotage because
              such a path creates shame, no matter how well it might for
              some time be masked. So I would say such thinking comes
              with whatever circumstances bring about empathy and
              freedom from shame.
            • Re: Other gifts?

              Fri, December 19, 2008 - 12:19 PM
              I would have to say i guess what has brought me to this point is a sum totally of who I am and my decisions in life. I guess besides all of my pain and frustration and feeling like a I did not belong and fit in, there was a much deeper program, along with the Holy Spirit which keep me going on. In the past there where times where I lost my way and fell off of the path. Some deeper strength and light has been leading me on. Maybe it is the great desire for truth and light, and maybe be it was being a loner. Being a loner, I find I was more detached and not so easily influenced by others, always having that detached and somewhat rebellious nature in me. I guess I have always relied more on what I felt, and not what I knew, when making decisions.

              I guess when you have to put it in a few words, it was like I was programed with this need and desire to fulfill and find out who I was and a need to become it. Not sure I always saw that looking foreword, but see it looking back. I guess being weird, I have always walked to a different drummer, but it has taken me decades to realize who I was and feeling safe enough to become it.

              Maybe there is not exact answer???

              I don't remember being or feeling threatened by when I was a kid or youth, but something kept me from realizing and making my gift usable instead of just a pain to me. But I wonder if I was aware on some subconscious or buried level, to wait until It was safe.

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