http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c?format=rss Tribe.net. Local Connections http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#3413ae26-728c-4ddc-8a88-00531f907e01 This is what happens to me. I'm learning from all of your sharing of your experiences and understanding of myself. I get knocked out emotionally and maybe I feel drawn to those that are in pain or sadness. Their emotions are real to me and it can be a stranger across a room. I wasn't sure if I focused on others' pain intentionally but maybe it's because it's the most overwhelming as some of you have said. Tue, 23 Jun 2009 16:31:14 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#3413ae26-728c-4ddc-8a88-00531f907e01 Manny 2009-06-23T16:31:14Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#b3ec652e-5093-42fb-9edf-bb1fadf785bd I think I can see your point, Malene, about making a distinction between shielding, as its been put, and prioritizing what is relevant, in particular the self. I resonated with your point, immediately, but it has taken some time to form a concept about what you are saying. Certainly, I have a concept for feeling overwhelmed. I have a concept for tuning out of the self and prioritizing relevance in terms of other people's feelings. These two things seem very connected causally. If I tune out of the self, then that empty space will be filled by things other than my self. Then, logically, I am not just being overwhelmed by others, but by my own decision to tune out of the self. Overwhelm, then, is a signal that I have made an error in thought, however necessary it may once have been. Perhaps the effect is the cause, a decision to overpower or tune out of the self. Spiritually, I would say this mirrors my expression of a very human mistake that goes back millions of years, to exercise power over nature(the self) in order to possess or duplicate the power of life instead of utilizing that power or energy to express life. (reading, Anastasia by Vladimir Megre). For me, I think it is a karmic decision programmed into my childhood, in order to give me the opportunity to correct my thought. By demonstrating the incorrect thought that it is a good idea to gain power over the self, I was forced into a situation where I felt I had to tune out of the self because I perceive i was being overpowered or overwhelmed. I have always thought, they or that overwhelmed me. When I have been in later situations that overwhelmed me, I have always been aware, firstly, of the other's wrong use of power due to an unconscious repression of the true self and, thus, access to an authentic transaction of need. However, this was also a mirror, however right I may have been in my empathic observations - namely, they have a need they fear will not be met. They were reflecting me and my own decision to not to honour the self. The self, as children, IS our need satisfied. Spiritually, nature is designed to give us everything we need. Every kind of pollution is caused by humanity exercising the thought that we need to overpower nature or find the details of the power of life in order to get what we need. We get what we need by overpowering nature when in fact we were designed to get everything from nature with little to no effort (see human history by Anastasia). We are not wrong for this. Our thought is flawed. The solution is to change our thought. My point is, protection always involves protection from one's own self. Any time we are in protection or shielding we are overpowering the self, our self. "They" are not trying to overpower us. "They" are overpowering themselves or a part of themselves that couldn't handle something and likely naturally so. Their reflection to us can only overpower us if we resonate with this decision, thence, our own, finding its way around our shields in order to help us change our thinking. When I look over my life, I can see that I have resonated with this decision a lot. I can really resonate with the whole notion of shielding. I am sure I use shielding. And I am sure I value it. My life validates my decision that shields are necessary. So, Malene, you are being a good teacher to me about myself. It is a compassion from the Universe, that I have been able to release enough to feel this truth to me. I am a beginner. I will always be a beginner. It helps me to use words to gain comprehension of a topic I find valuable. It is a joy to be able to express. And I say, wow. This is really good stuff that I think I can use to change some of my concepts and thoughts. I love all you people. If I shield myself (which is what I am doing by tuning out of the self), then I am shielding myself, necessarily, from my own decision, since it is effectively unconscious and, thus, the perceived necessity to shield is unconsciously conceived. What I am suggesting is that, for me, tuning out of the self and shielding are the same act of protection from overwhelm that maintains a state of overwhelm and draws situations that mirror that feeling/thought/decision. In all likelihood, if I am shielding myself from others, I am shielding myself from other people's decision to tune out of their self, my own decision. Thus, they are mirroring my own coping mechanism and any attempt I make at visualizing a shield is effectively a visualization of my own protection or a way into it, a conscious expression of a subconscious protection from my protection-oriented decision to tune out of the self. The self is thus, effectively associated with pain. But as Malene has suggested, "how can you protect yourself from you?" ~ Everything that we need is good. People are bound to have different values about a subject so vast in range and import. I greatly value Malene's courage to share her thoughts, for it has made me feel comfortable to share my own. Sun, 14 Jun 2009 21:56:29 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#b3ec652e-5093-42fb-9edf-bb1fadf785bd $item.owner.firstName 2009-06-14T21:56:29Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#1a1979ea-9f78-4506-aceb-f7a9ffa976d9 Michelle, I can do this around other people but it just takes a little more mental energy that normal. Also-- sometimes I forget to to this, but I find the more I do it the more it just becomes natural and I don't have to really think about it. Last night I had another gig at a private party... I noticed afterwards that I did not go through my whole shielding process but I was totally fine. Had a few butterflies, but I felt safe. Definitly the environment helped, but I think that the shielding process is becoming more automatic for me.Practice practice! Sun, 14 Jun 2009 20:48:59 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#1a1979ea-9f78-4506-aceb-f7a9ffa976d9 simple songs 2009-06-14T20:48:59Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#d007dd75-5163-4bb0-b016-d2bbb2b11e47 Yes :) I read your story. I like how you prepared yourself to let go of the situation. Sun, 14 Jun 2009 20:19:27 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#d007dd75-5163-4bb0-b016-d2bbb2b11e47 $item.owner.firstName 2009-06-14T20:19:27Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#62b4b526-bcec-4a04-b3bc-59f4d9404ff7 **"release this physical energy by shaking, shivering, laughing or crying or any of numerous energy practices that people are naturally drawn to. Simple is good, I find. If it shakes you up, then shake it off."** LOL, hey I'm not alone!! :D Sun, 14 Jun 2009 19:58:05 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#62b4b526-bcec-4a04-b3bc-59f4d9404ff7 Michelle 2009-06-14T19:58:05Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#5847d4d6-7763-4213-88b3-9f50f4793845 There could be limitless reasons why one decides that there is no outlet for the self (in a given situation). Once this decision is made, however, this is tantamount to deciding that feeling overwhelmed and all its attendant values is more important than feeling one's self. In my life, I can relate to this. This decision must, by nature, become unconscious, since how could one remain conscious of such a choice? Fixing on or dwelling on certain kinds of situations or impressions is one common result, I am led to understand. So you say, get in touch with the feeling of self. I might add, find ways of tuning your body and organ system to a signal that allows for the present reality that whatever situation led you to believe that being overwhelmed is more important than one's self is no longer valid, if it ever was. Shake out the unused or stopped energy(pain) locked in the muscles, bones and joints. One thing that things do that make us afraid or angry is stimulate that locked energy. Another thing I think is important to do is to tell ourselves it is ok to release this physical energy by shaking, shivering, laughing or crying or any of numerous energy practices that people are naturally drawn to. Simple is good, I find. If it shakes you up, then shake it off. Gratitude helps too, it immediately tunes us to the pristine blueprint for our energy system. Another thing I have found is to listen to people telling me that this kind of expansion or growth is easy. One other thing that I have tried for "retuning to self" is flower essences and, in particular, Bach's Rescue Remedy. Flowers have the right signals for the organs. Nature's purpose and joy is to serve humans in this way. Our conscious mind may not need this, but our subconcsious may need to know that everything is ok, still. The more we invite the nature in through gratitude or praise/appreciation for nature, nature receives this as an invitation to pass through the invisible barrier that humans have set up. Then good medicine can appear from anywhere at any time, like a cool breeze through your window or door. Affirming the feeling of self in one's heart and that this is more important than thoughts related to being overwhelmed could be one really great affirmation. I am certainly very interested in this. I am not quite sure where I am at, but I am enjoying the pattern of expansion in my life. And wisdom like that which you have shared is a joy to me. Someone is bound to be more important than us if we are experiencing our own choice to unfeel our self. Neither the feeling of being bigger than or inferior to can be correct. Although, I feel we come by this decision (and its effects) quite honestly, given that most children are incapable of processing emotion and thus, themselves, beyond a certain point. I am sure that the cure for most illness lay in finding out what led to the feeling of overwhelm or shock, if only as an adjunct to feeling oneself, releasing the stagnations, resentments and anger that often result (all perfectly natural manifestations of pure awareness or energy) honoured and served by an infinite Universe of happiness embodied as every human being. Sun, 14 Jun 2009 19:39:59 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#5847d4d6-7763-4213-88b3-9f50f4793845 $item.owner.firstName 2009-06-14T19:39:59Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#5edccc5c-e452-4f78-bfe9-90f834273b5b Yes, Getting in touch with that feeling of 'self'. Because, there can only be a certain amount of emotions inside, so filling the entire space with"you" makes very little room for other peoples feelings. And making 'you' relevant, even when you can't get to that inner feeling, still helps you to not let others take up the space. Sun, 14 Jun 2009 18:26:07 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#5edccc5c-e452-4f78-bfe9-90f834273b5b malene 2009-06-14T18:26:07Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#fc5e1245-9820-4ee5-820e-dece6a9e78c1 **"Shielding helps a lot and just visualizing a wall around me helps too."** Simplesong, I think this might be what I do with that quote "There is no one in the world but me, all else is just a movie playing on the cosmic screen." When I am really overwhelmed it does help especially if I can close my eyes and/or go into a room by myself and chant this. Maybe I if I can get better at visualizing it I can do it no matter where I am. Can you do this while you are amongst people? Sun, 14 Jun 2009 18:16:58 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#fc5e1245-9820-4ee5-820e-dece6a9e78c1 Michelle 2009-06-14T18:16:58Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#d019f027-6093-462a-9ae4-9fed0535a047 "If you want to feel that you are in control of the empath ability, you should start by explaining to yourself what you really find relevant to you. You are already making a subconscious decision about it, so why not bring it out of the darkness and redefine your values?" There is definitely a different signal I get when I believe something is simply "happening" to me as compared to an experience I am participating in. The more difficult the situation, the deeper my hidden values seem to be, values inculcated perhaps by circumstances in childhood. It helps when I consider that sometimes it is necessary to make it about something outside until I can get to the truth of how it is really about me in the sense of helping me to connect to something that I need. Sometimes, I have found, making a feeling connection with a need can be so fulfilling that I don't have to objectify it anymore as something "happening" to me. This is seems to have, for me, its own natural process. Life wants to move and to flow. There is something that happens to us, I think, when we are overwhelmed with anything, say feelings from any source, for long periods of time. We are unable to meet the challenge life has presented and so there can be this energy stored up inside that can come out at unexpected times. Malene, you make a valuable suggestion to me, a very valuable suggestion that the kinds of circumstances I attract and the more difficult overwhelm I might feel are connected, an opportunity's perhaps to release the flow of energy needed to meet these challenges in the present. When we are overwhelmed into any kind of trauma we build values around that trauma. The self is a feeling being. If we need to hide the feelings and energies of overwhelm than we need to hide ourselves. I am very interested in this connection that has been suggested by other people I have read. What is the next step, then, in your opinion, Marlene. I sense you have already alluded to it. But if you have any more thoughts, I would like to hear them. And I would just like say thank you to everyone for being so clear about what they think and how they feel. That feels very natural and good to me. Sun, 14 Jun 2009 18:07:12 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#d019f027-6093-462a-9ae4-9fed0535a047 $item.owner.firstName 2009-06-14T18:07:12Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#5f4433b6-6471-4a3f-aa5a-71ae50671700 I feel I have more balance (control) over who I am today. I think, for me, it had the most to do with self compassion/love and self understanding then anything else. I thought (in my old martyr pattern days) that others were more important them me and in a way they were because I felt what they felt stronger then I felt what I felt, so their energy had the ability to cause pain or joy within me. I did feel pain more acutely because I am more of a physical empath and others pain can bring me to my knees but their joys also could cause me to feel like I was flying with them. Just got so tired of being smashed around by the seas of other's lives! When I spent time withdrawing and learning what 'MY'energy feels like (and even what I liked to eat) there was a stabilizing of things. When I did physical activities (gardening, Tai Chi, Kung Fu, Yoga) that inspired me I felt again a bit closer to my own 'inner nature' (that un-namable, to me, sense of inner connection, knowing and joy). I think everyone here believes that it doesn't matter how you get that control/self-acceptance it is that we have to find our own way and that it is actually do-able. These empath tribes have helped take my inner balance and understanding of being empathic to a calmer deeper level. I did all the other work but for some reason just knowing that others out there can relate (and still remain delightfully individual and human) has been a beautiful gift for me. I enjoy different view points because in my spiritual counseling I encounter all viewpoints and it helps me to style-flex and support them where ever they are. Sun, 14 Jun 2009 18:05:09 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#5f4433b6-6471-4a3f-aa5a-71ae50671700 Michelle 2009-06-14T18:05:09Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#4810ba5b-94a0-412e-a150-6b39e1b36381 malene I don't understand you. Why do you continue to feel the need to attack my jugular when all I said was, "I don't agree"?? Why is this? Have I personally attacked you? No, I have not. to answer your question, by posting this question you asked for my opinion on the subject within. By asking "is this relevent to you" you asked for my opinion. I merely suggested that I liked what you brought but that I didn't think it worked for everybody. How in the hell does that get me attacked? wow lady where are you coming from? nobody's attacking you here. I'm making a point, same as you. back off. got it? Sat, 13 Jun 2009 15:52:19 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#4810ba5b-94a0-412e-a150-6b39e1b36381 Joanne 2009-06-13T15:52:19Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#f78ddf08-a0db-4d78-a442-9d25a66f6462 "You *did* ask me for my opinion" Oh? Where did I do that? I made an open question "is this relevant to you?" So, if that question is to be answered, then for you it would be: "No, I don't find it relevant." That really would have done the trick. "I will suggest that if you are going to ask people for their opinions on something you obviously feel very strongly about that you be willing at the very least to accept that some people may not agree." I did not ask for your opinion! Sure your opinion is as welcome as any. It is NOT the disagreeing. It is your way of doing it! If you don't feel you can use it - fine by me! Really! I write with the perspective, that it is possible to control the empathy. You don't believe that to be true. You feel, that I am attacking you for stating, that *theoretically* you too could bring this under control. ("you", as in empaths in general) So, you feel, that it is in your right to attack me for writing that. It is not just a simple matter of agreeing/disagreeing. It never was. I can most certainly deal with people disagreeing with me. In fact, most people on the empath communities online disagree with me, so I am kind of used to it. But you are blaming me for writing something which challenges your perspective. If I were to read an article about God and how praying works, I would not feel challenged by that point of view. I am not a christian, too much indoctrination as a child made me turn my back on it, but still. I know, in my heard, that God does not exist. To me, at least. That is why a text about praying and it's proven physical advantages (religious people live on average 10 years longer than non-believers) would not challenge my point of view - because I have made up my mind. You have a perspective, that the empathy cannot be controlled. At least that is the opinion you give to me as an argument for disagreeing. So why does my writing put you off? If you know in your heard that I am wrong and you are right, then why do you feel the need for projecting your inner conflicts onto me? Sat, 13 Jun 2009 09:23:12 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#f78ddf08-a0db-4d78-a442-9d25a66f6462 malene 2009-06-13T09:23:12Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#89a0162e-1ffd-4108-8ce8-fb3d108002d3 I've gotten better at controlling it. Shielding helps a lot and just visualizing a wall around me helps too. Also-- constantly reminding myself that I am more sensitive than many others... that helps me too. Maybe I'm not literally "controlling" the empathy, but I am keeping myself from being overwhelmed. It's nice. I don't want to get rid of this gift totally, but it's nice to feel like I have knowledge on what I can do about it. That makes me feel like I am in control. And just for the record... putting my 2 cents in here... Joanne, I did not think you came off as offensive. In fact, I thought it was really nice the way you owned up to the fact that you feel you are not good words. Just saying that shows me that you do in fact have the ability of using your words well. Sat, 13 Jun 2009 07:58:18 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#89a0162e-1ffd-4108-8ce8-fb3d108002d3 simple songs 2009-06-13T07:58:18Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#d824caea-287e-41e6-b3a6-998b738f2e52 and I state again--I see your point, but I disagree. It's as simple as that. Your comment about God not being real... there again, I see your point, but what you don't seem to recognize is that I didn't ask you your opinion on whether or not you thought God was real. You *did* ask me for my opinion and I told you that I could see your point, but that I didn't agree that it would work for everybody. I'm not arguing anymore on this with you. I will suggest that if you are going to ask people for their opinions on something you obviously feel very strongly about that you be willing at the very least to accept that some people may not agree. Sat, 13 Jun 2009 03:29:27 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#d824caea-287e-41e6-b3a6-998b738f2e52 Joanne 2009-06-13T03:29:27Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#60896b39-ce43-4671-b30b-d2e9b21b7e65 To London: I have read your message, and I am looking forward to responding to it! But the tribe.net keeps giving me error messages, so I think, I may have to wait 'till your membership has been approved. I want to do it the right way. :-) - Malene Sat, 13 Jun 2009 01:26:17 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#60896b39-ce43-4671-b30b-d2e9b21b7e65 malene 2009-06-13T01:26:17Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#fe7bda4a-7fa8-4c93-afe3-d041636bb80c "you seemed to put this theory in a box and decide that if it worked for you it must work for everybody and I was merely suggesting that this is not the case." I do not write "perhaps" or "maybe" or any other vague statements in my texts. I share it because it works for me, that is what I pass on. I do not perceive the empathy as a curse, I see it as something which can be controlled. If I were to write "maybe" or "perhaps" it would speak against both the point of my article and my view upon the empathy. You have a different view. A view in which you cannot control the empathy. My view is that it is exactly that perception, that makes the empathy overwhelming. So obviously, when I write with the perspective that empaths are not victims of their ability, it puts you off. I am sorry, that you are not in control. I am sorry, that you perceive it that way - and maybe it is true for you. You ask me to open the box for a different perspective, but the perspective you want me to open up for is exactly the perspective I am speaking against, because that is not going to bring control over the ability. In my not so humble opinion. It all comes down to that perspective. Imagine that you wrote an article about how praying to God had helped you in dealing with the empathy. Now, imagine that I wrote a respond saying you should open the box for the perception, that God does not exist. I would continue this by stating, that I found it a bit off putting, that you believe in God, and that you had forgotten that we are all individuals. Would you alter your article, so that it matched my demands? No, at the most, you would state in the beginning that the reader could use it if they pleased. You would not make my point of view a part of your article, because it would speak against the whole point of your article. But at the same time, you would not use words like "perhaps" or "maybe" in an article about saying a prayer. "Perhaps God exist, so maybe it would be a good idea to pray?" It really defies the point. Fri, 12 Jun 2009 18:36:41 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#fe7bda4a-7fa8-4c93-afe3-d041636bb80c malene 2009-06-12T18:36:41Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#6d7fbaae-0abc-4f4d-86e9-a344f0f206ca My apologies for offending. I struggle quite a lot with expressing myself properly, the words don't ever seem to quite thuroughly express what I feel, emotions being such complex things. Part of what happend, and I'm going to be blunt just for the reason I stated--I'm not good with words. So please, bear with me. But every time I read some of your writing I get a bit of an attitude that's offputing. I'm not saying it's intentional on your part, just that it rubs me the wrong way. And before you tell me I'm wrong, I'm not the only one whose noticed it. someone else responded exactly this way to another article you wrote. But what off put me was that what I heard from what you wrote is that if I don't find any relevance in what you shared then there was something wrong with me. I was offended by that simply because I *have* been criticised for being who I am and what I can do. I'm also a medium, in finding out that what I was feeling was called empathy and trying to learn to do exactly what your article was about, I opened a can of worms, I discovered I could talk to the dead. And I have found that *my* gift simply doesn't work that way. I don't believe I *can* just turn it off, because I have tried, in every fashion there is. Including yours. As i said, I soak up other people's emotions even when I sleep. And I sleep wrapped in layers upon layers of protection, including the violet flame. So, only thing I can come up with is that maybe I'm not supposed to turn it off. Maybe it's there for a reason. So what I was saying was that I was happy for you that you found something to turn it off, and I mean that sincerely, but I was also suggesting that it might not work for everybody. But again, I'm sorry for offending. As I said, the manner in which you express yourself simply doesn't come across to me as you likely had intended and I felt rubbed the wrong way by it. Fact it, in forums like this, it happens. people are just different and we come from different backgrounds. But the truth is, you asked me for my opinion on what you wrote. I gave it. Am I not allowed to disagree and to suggest that you open the box just a bit? Am I only supposed to congratulate you and agree? as for cut and dry--you must not have heard that saying? it's a saying... you seemed to put this theory in a box and decide that if it worked for you it must work for everybody and I was merely suggesting that this is not the case. The phrase had nothing to do with your writing being dull. peace to you. Fri, 12 Jun 2009 14:08:52 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#6d7fbaae-0abc-4f4d-86e9-a344f0f206ca Joanne 2009-06-12T14:08:52Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#22c6215d-5f3a-44da-8cc6-ed360bb6f860 I don't think Joanne was trying to be condescending here...I think she's acknowledging it affects people differently. I can find some relevance to myself in your post. I think I do find people in pain more relevant, although I'm not sure if that's because those are the feelings that tend to knock me over (versus some being happy or calm) or if I focus in on them because I think it's where I can understand or help. Probably some of both. Thu, 11 Jun 2009 23:22:08 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#22c6215d-5f3a-44da-8cc6-ed360bb6f860 Rachel 2009-06-11T23:22:08Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#c56d965c-882e-478b-9f90-59f754bffde2 As I was saying in the beginning: "take what you can use and leave the rest" There is no need for you to be condescending about it, just because you don't feel it would work for "YOU". It does work for some people I have shared it with, especially because it is "neat, cut and dry". Perhaps if I sparkled it with a bit of "energy fields", a couple of guardian angles and a dash of power animals, it would seem less "dry". But there is quite a lot of that out there already. My "neat thought" has helped me, that is correct. I have not forced you to try it out. So I have had a purpose of posting it here. What was your purpose of criticizing it? Thu, 11 Jun 2009 18:54:31 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#c56d965c-882e-478b-9f90-59f754bffde2 malene 2009-06-11T18:54:31Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#e2f74aac-7735-4f11-b1c0-53b715092bd8 My advice is meant for controlling the empath ability, I don't deal with spirits. Thu, 11 Jun 2009 18:44:03 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#e2f74aac-7735-4f11-b1c0-53b715092bd8 malene 2009-06-11T18:44:03Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#e2b35b5b-0e1f-49b9-97af-d8231e63dddc I see what you're saying, but for me, this isn't the case. I think what you're forgetting here is that we're all individuals. I'm not going to be like you. so, great that it works that way for you, but it doesn't for me. I pick up stuff around me whether I shield or not, and I don't concsiously or otherwise seek out people's emotions. YOU can consciously seek out someone's emotions, but I cannot and not everyone is going to. Case in point, what about when someone's sleeping and the mind is shut down? It comes to me even while I sleep. I've woken up with emotions that weren't mine simply because I was visited by a spirit while I was sleeping. So, it's a neat thought, and I'm happy that it works that way for YOU, but I really don't think it's that cut and dry for everybody. Everybody's different and that's okay. Thu, 11 Jun 2009 14:42:46 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#e2b35b5b-0e1f-49b9-97af-d8231e63dddc Joanne 2009-06-11T14:42:46Z http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#ca881987-529b-4188-b683-8d3d518a0dfb I posted this on my blog ( www.skeptic.dk ) not so long ago, but I would like to share it with you here as well. Take what you can use, leave the rest. ;-) ------------------------------------ You already are in control. “Oh, but I feel so overwhelmed, I can’t stand it, I can’t find myself… It is a curse, I do not control it!” Sure you do. You just haven’t thought of it that way, because the first suggestion about ’shielding’ leads you to believe, that the impressions come all by themselves. They don’t. You do not feel everything everywhere all of the time. It may seem that way, because you cannot feel you, but the impressions you get comes from your own subconscious thoughts about what is even just remotely relevant for you to tune in on. Relevance That is a keyword for my theory about how you best control your empath ability. I am sitting here in front of my mac trying to formulate my thoughts about this issue. The thing that is most relevant for me right now is my sense of me. So I am relevant to me right now. I have to have a sense of me in order to put my thoughts into words in such a way that I get my message through the right way. But other people are relevant for me as well, as I am writing for those who do not feel that they are in control. So I have these impressions stored in my memory of people I have encountered on the web, who felt this way. So my focus is divided properly in accordance with what I find most relevant for typing this post. When my own ability exploded one day in january ‘08, I could not walk down to the local supermarket without getting knocked out emotionally. It is not because this was new, and that I did not have the right tools for dealing with it. No, when I think back on the experience, it was because I found all emotions around me relevant. I knew, I had this ability before I switched from latent to “full blown” empath. A long story, that involves other empaths, but quite irrelevant for this topic. Anyway, I knew, but it was still relevant for me at that time to be convinced. And so it was very relevant for me to experience that I actually could tune in on complete strangers, even though at the time I did not consciously make that decision. I do not find other peoples emotional state that relevant in order to function on a daily basis. Sometimes something comes up, which makes me think: “this is relevant” and I automatically tune in on it. Control If you want to feel that you are in control of the empath ability, you should start by explaining to yourself what you really find relevant to you. You are already making a subconscious decision about it, so why not bring it out of the darkness and redefine your values? It is also worth considering, how you perceive yourself amongst others. If you think that you as a person is not relevant, or that people in pain are very relevant, then those are the things you tune in on. Be honest with yourself while making these considerations. If you deep down feel, that another persons anger is relevant, and you do not see ‘you’ as relevant, then that is how you have managed it. But then perhaps it is time to evaluate that as well? There is nothing spiritual about this, you cannot shield yourself from you. Shielding works in the aspect of you finding your shield relevant. It gives you something to visualize, and that does make you not focus on other peoples emotions. But it doesn’t really fix anything, and you do spend a lot of energy on something which is not relevant at all. So… Is this relevant for you? Tue, 09 Jun 2009 21:59:50 GMT http://empaths.tribe.net/thread/65a4bed3-b94b-40eb-a00f-414252b4fe7c#ca881987-529b-4188-b683-8d3d518a0dfb malene 2009-06-09T21:59:50Z